What does it mean to live life with integrity? For most of us, it means being honest about the "big" things. It means having the appearance of living an honorable life, while making excuses for the "little" lies. You know, those little white lies that surely won't hurt. No one is going to find out, you won't be caught and you can easily find ways to justify them and tell yourself "it's really not a big deal." However, what integrity truly means is possessing the ability to be completely honest, transparent, and holding oneself to a high moral code. It means telling the truth when no one is looking, when no one could possibly know you're lying. It means telling the truth even when it hurts and even when there might be negative consequences.
I've been doing a lot of reading recently on honesty, integrity, transparency and intimacy and how all these things are connected; especially in terms of our closest relationships. I'm always in awe when I hear stories of people being brave and courageous enough to live in such a vulnerable way that allows one to fully exhibit the traits of integrity. I came across such a story a few days ago and I haven't been able to stop thinking about it. I've read about the incident on various platforms, and while the story changes slightly the gist of it is as follows. A gentleman by the name of Brian Davis was chasing his first PGA tour win in 2010. At the end of regulation play, Brian Davis and Jim Furyk were in a tie for first place. On the first hole of the playoff, Davis found himself in a predicament. His ball had come to rest in the sand and amongst nearby reeds. He was nevertheless confident in his ability to recover, and chipped the ball successfully back onto the green. His position looked to extend the play off, however Davis stunned everyone by calling over rules official, Slugger White and making a shocking confession. Davis admitted that, while he didn't feel anything, he 'thought' he saw a reed move during his swing. He thought. The initial ruling was that Davis was fine and no penalty had occurred. It wasn't until the play was reviewed using super slo-mo that it was determined that Davis' club had indeed 'brushed' the reed. It would have been so easy for Davis to keep his thoughts to himself. He could have justified it to himself as it was certainly possible that what he 'thought' he saw was nothing more than sand or the wind blowing a reed. He didn't feel his club make contact and he wasn't even certain of what he saw. The movement, the contact, was SO slight it wasn't seen by anyone else, not even during the initial replay when the officials were trying to see something. Even though his admission cost him a win AND nearly half a million dollars, Davis decided his integrity was the most important thing that day. He valued the game and the rules in such a way he couldn't allow himself to be dishonest and still feel good about a potential win. He was honest when no one saw his mishap. That is true integrity!
I can just hear his wife and children, who had already made plans based on promises in the event of his win. I'm sure they were initially disappointed and probably even a little frustrated at Davis for speaking up. I'm sure there was grumbling and even a little teasing.Ok, likely more than just a little. However, once the magnitude of what he had done sunk in, I'm certain they were extremely proud and humbled by his actions. What a legacy to leave for your family! They will never forget the time he faced winning it all, and lost because his honor was more important. I don't know about you, but I think Brian Davis and his family were the true winners that day.
Comments